Relationships change so fast. One day everything can be great in a relationship or friendship we have with someone, and then the next day because of some miscommunication, a relationship can be broken. Maybe I should rephrase that. Relationships can be broken so fast. It takes time for a relationship to develop and grow, possibly even years. But in one conversation or one action, a relationship can seem irreparable and seem as if it cannot be reconciled.
I’m speaking from experience. While I work hard to have good relationships with people, I often mess up, usually with something I say, that breaks the relationship. It often leaves me in a puddle of tears because I was not intending for the relationship to end or become only cordial. With each broken relationship, I think my heart breaks too.
This is a difficult topic for me to write about. My relationships with others always need attention. I often make mistakes in my relationships and friendships. As I am writing, I keep thinking about the specific broken relationships I have had over the years as well as all the grace people have given me to avoid brokenness in our relationship. I feel guilty. I feel ashamed. But I know there is grace and forgiveness for that too.
I feel inadequate to speak on reconciliation with you because my life has been filled with more broken relationships than I would like to admit. As I think and write, the more I realize this post is for me. I am realizing the value and beauty in reconciled relationships.
We were designed for community, and when community is broken, we are not experiencing the best God has for us.
While relationships change, and we may not see each other or desire to be around each other as much, I don’t think God designed us to have beyond-repairable relationships.
At least, that is what I see from God’s work.
When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden, they broke their close relationship with God. Before sin, they had community with God. After sin, they hid (Genesis 3:8). When God came to look for them, they “hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God” in the forest of the garden (KJV Genesis 3:8). Because of Adam and Eve’s sin, every generation after them is born with sin (Romans 5:12). Colossians 1:21 even states that we are “alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works” from God (KJV). In our minds, we are rebellious toward God.
Each person is born with a broken relationship with God. However, each person is also born with only a longing God can abundantly fill.
Our relationship with God needed reconciling.
To reconcile means to restore to fellowship. It is to fix what is broken.
God saw that our relationship with Him was broken because of sin, so He chose to reconcile it to Himself. He was the only one capable of doing it.
God sent Jesus to earth to die on the cross to pay for our sins.
Colossians 1:20 states, “And, having made peace through the blood of his cross, by him to reconcile all things unto himself; by him, I say, whether they be things in earth, or things in heaven” (KJV).
Jesus “made peace through the blood of his cross” to restore our relationship with God (KJV Colossians 1:20).
Incredible. We didn’t fix anything. We can’t fix anything. It was all because of Him.
Because of God’s reconciling, we are now and will be presented in Heaven as “holy and unblameable and unreproveable” in God’s sight (KJV Colossians 1:22).
Why does it matter that we are reconciled to God?
How can it not matter? Can you imagine being alienated from God who is the Creator of everything? Can you imagine if God did not care to fix our relationship? We would be in a dark state. That is for sure. Reconciliation is vital to our lives and healthy well-being.
Reconciled relationships does not mean best friends.
God designed us to live in community with people. The corruption of sin is what keeps us from community. God’s grace is what allows us to receive reconciliation.
To have a restored relationship with someone does not mean we need to see them every day or have them as our “go-to” friend. Sometimes reconciliation comes from conversation and is followed by distance. However, conversation and forgiveness are needed.
It is easy to think, “Well, it’s not my fault our relationship is broken.” It is our fault if we leave it that way without attempting to do our part. It is our responsibility to at least reach out.
God did nothing to disrupt the community humans had with Him, but he did everything to fix it.
Reconciling broken relationships is hard. Jesus knows. He went through plenty in order to restore us to a good standing relationship with God.
When we trust Jesus Christ as our Savior from sin, we instantly are reconciled to God. We, then, reap the fruit of His reconciliation.
Reconciled is who we are in Christ.
Discussion Questions
Answer the following questions in the comments below to reflect more on this post.
- According to Colossians 1:21, what did God choose to do?
- What change did Jesus’ death on the cross accomplish in your life?
- How can you reconcile your broken relationships?
My church’s youth group is studying a series on “Who I am in Christ.” These posts are my thoughts on what we discuss each week. I included a few discussion questions that I asked our teenagers at the end of each post for you to join the discussion. I want to lay a foundation for my youth group kids to know who they truly are in Christ, and maybe you or someone in your life needs to know that too. This is the second week, “I am Reconciled.” The first week is “I am Forgiven.” Check out the category “Who I am in Christ” to see all the posts.
